Someone said that there are two kinds of people.
Those looking for fun...
... and those fleeing to pain.
You have fun, you're enjoying yourself, enjoying the good times, but they don't last and neither are the good memories.
Pain is the thing that lasts, it haunts us. It keeps us going. You're trying to forget the bad past experience, but you can't. If you forget it, you won't learn from it. You need to learn a lesson, teach yourself the hard way, nobody else is going to that for you. Pain. You hurt yourself, physically, by accident or you just had a shitty day. It heals and get a scar. That's your reminder, you say to yourself, Do NOT do this again.
Each time you glance at it, you know what caused it.
But what happens when you get hurt emotionally. Love is a fickle bitch that easily transforms to hate. We live to love. You often hear "Love conquers all", yeah, well it doesn't. Love rarely lasts. It's wonderful thing to love, even better to feel loved. But then comes the reality. You love somebody, but they don't love you back. You try to win the heart but instead you break your own. You try to tape the pieces together. And try again. With each try you lose something, a part of yourself. Each failed attempt is shaping you. Each failed attempt is creating more and more scar tissue. Too bad you can't see your heart, too bad you will never learn. You just grow duller to the idea of love, each time it lays you down. And then you grow dull to the idea of living. You stop living and just exist. Lost existence, on a liquid diet, days at the time. No point in waking up, no point in sleeping. You stop caring. Live just to live, day after day.
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